When I was a teenager, I wanted to be all kinds of things when I finished school. The top choices were between a pastry chef, a nurse and a nutritionist. I had these big dreams of going to college, pursuing a career in whatever major I had eventually chosen, become financially set, and start a family. That was my plan. But we all know what they say about the best laid plans.
It never worked out to be. I fell ill when I was 13, shortly after my father had passed away. I barely made it through high school, and ended up finishing at home and graduating a year early, ahead of my class. I took a year off at that point to decide what I wanted to do. When faced with a college enrollment form, for the local community college - because going away wasn't an option after becoming ill, I chose to choose journalism as my major. I thought, "why not?"
After all, I had always enjoyed writing, ever since I was about seven or eight. But I had never considered it to be a career choice for me. I had always wanted to pursue something a bit more physical, that's just part of who I am. But my illnesses took that away from me. But nonetheless, I chose to try a few classes at the local college. While I only had been able to attend for a total of two weeks before dropping out due to being sick, that small decision to try would end up changing my life forever - that college was where I met my husband.
We dated for awhile, albeit a short while of three months, and then we got engaged and married a year and a half later. Three months after our wedding, we were parents to a gorgeous little boy. It seemed that life had other plans in store for me. But, there was a time that I fell heavily depressed over the whole situation. Where was my life going? How was I going to provide for my newborn son? As a mom, I was torn between that feeling of 'I would do anything for my son. I'll go out and work a job,' to 'I know that I've got to take care of myself in order to take care of him.'
I did end up having a breakdown, shortly after my son was born. Those feelings mixed in with post-partum depression turned into a suicide attempt, which luckily didn't succeed. I was given help and put on the correct medicine and eventually got back onto the right track. I began pursuing online writing jobs, little ones, here and there, to make a little extra money to help support my family. My husband encouraged me every step of the way, and still does to this day.
I'd been an avid reader of quite a few blogs for many years, and had always dreamed of starting one of my own, monetizing it, and supporting my family with it. I'm slowly but surely doing that. If there is one thing that I have learned in life, is that it is entirely too short. My father died at 43 years-old, and certainly did not get to live out his life's goals. My step-dad passed away almost nine months ago. Life is precious, and it can be snatched away from you in an instant, we thought my stepdad was cancer-free. It turns out he had very little cancer, but the mesh that was implanted in him so he could eat again ate right through his esophagus, thus creating a hole that couldn't be repaired.
I know that it is too short to worry about how much money we're making, whether we have the latest handbags and designer clothes, the newest cars, shiny shoes, the latest smart device, or a fancy house. Hell, we live with my mother to save money for our own home for goodness sake. Do I like it? Hardly. I want to live in my own home with my husband and son. But right now we have to hoard money to do that.
Can I say that my family and I are financially secure? Of course not. Like many other families, we have to take our paychecks and make them last from one week to the next while budgeting for food, gas, electricity, heat, and all those fun bills you have to pay when you become an adult. But I do know one thing, we're happy. Yes, sometimes it sucks, I'm certainly not going to lie. But we have enough love to more than make up for that.
My husband works a job during the day, and is pursuing his career in becoming an author by night, and he is slowly taking courses to become a paralegal so he can have a career and give us a better life. I use the daytime hours attempting to scour for writing jobs on the internet and writing sponsored posts and ads for money so I can bring in at least a little bit of money. And I use the night time to promote, otherwise, how does one get traffic? And Syrus? well, he's being a child. I won't allow him to have to grow up at such a young age. He needs to be a child for as long as possible, because all too soon, children are awoken from the tranquility of their innocent and serenity filled slumbers to the harsh realities of the real world.
|He truly is growing up so fast. First grade in September.|
When he does grow up, though, one thing that my husband and I will hope to have instilled in him is that he needs to follow his dreams in life. We want him chase them with passion and fervor, and to never let anyone diminish his spirit. We'll teach him to recognize that making mistakes is an ingrained part of our human nature, that nobody is perfect, and errors have to be made in order for one to learn. But most important of all, I want him to know that life doesn't revolve around how much money you'll make in a lifetime, but how much love, laughter and light that you've experienced and given to the world.
"After all, life's too short to be anything but happy."
- Karl Marx
- Karl Marx